If your loved one says or does something that doesnâ€™t feel good, and you ignore it, or rationalize that it wasnâ€™t meant to offend you, and you donâ€™t say anything, then you are lying. You are not being honest with your feelings. If you do this often, you will shut your heart to your loved one.
I urge everyone reading this to make the connection between lying and emotional availability. Most importantly, hiding your feelings from yourself is lying to yourself. Hiding your feelings from someone else is lying to them. Thereâ€™s a kind, yet courageous, way to be honest in these situations. It goes something like this: â€œI trust that you didnâ€™t mean to hurt me when you said or did ___________, and it did hurt me.â€
Every feeling is important and holds a key to your spiritual development. If you hide your fear, you can have no true faith. If you hide your sadness, your happiness will be hollow. If you hide your anger, you end up depressed. You can learn to welcome every feeling, even unpleasant ones, as a divine gift. If you do this, you will never need to lie.
Excerpted from the article:
Lying or Being Emotionally Unavailable? Everybody Loses
by Barry Vissell.
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